Dec 20, 09:01 PM
Three-and-a-half years later, and still waiting for that NASCAR ‘Hottie Calendar’
Posted by Cheryl Walker under Racing FunIn July of 2004 I was inspired to state my opinion that a ‘NASCAR Driver Hottie Calendar’ ought to be published. I even suggested the twelve drivers that at that time I thought would be the perfect personalities to pictorially grace each month of such a calendar. Female NASCAR fans from all over loved the idea, and sent me their suggestions as well. Response was so great that I followed up with a ‘NASCAR Crew Chief Hottie Calendar’. The idea of this, too, was warmly received by my sister NASCAR fans.
We were all united in our thinking that if such a calendar were for sale, we would all be in line to buy it. We were, and, I’m sure, still are smart enough to know that NASCAR would never permit anything published that was too erotic or steamy. But consider these PG-13 rated possibilities: a picture of one of our favorite racing warriors in an unbuttoned soft flannel shirt and well-worn jeans on the porch of a quiet cabin in the woods; another of a driver in swimming trunks, lounging underneath a palm tree; or perhaps one of a driver working up a sweat in a gym. Enough skin to make estrogen levels soar, but not enough to break any NASCAR drivers’ rules of propriety. I would bet my Jeff Gordon-holding-a-Pepsi standup that such a calendar would sell like… hotcakes.
Here is my updated list of drivers or crew chiefs that would be perfect for a twelve-month calendar, in no particular order. Everyone is welcome to post their choices as well. Who knows? Perhaps we may finally talk someone into publishing it.
Juan Pablo Montoya: This thirty-two year-old Columbian has dark eyes that sometimes blaze with passion, sometimes twinkle with wicked humor. I imagine him in a photo with the lush vegetation of his native country behind him, with a face suggesting that he’d love to show you around.
Kyle Petty: He’s tall and lanky, and who doesn’t wonder what that ponytail looks like unfurled? We all know he’s passionate, and even has a bit of a temper. A photo of him on his bike, perhaps?
Dale Jarrett: Perhaps the younger women don’t appreciate the graying hair and mature face that this former champion now boasts, but there are those among us who believe those things can be incredibly fetching, especially when matched with a strong and stable personality. I can imagine a picture of him stoking a fireplace, on a dark and stormy night.
J.J. Yeley: This 31 year-old is another brunette with soulful eyes. Can’t you imagine a picture of him alongside a lazy river, perched on a rock, asking you with those eyes to share your secrets?
Martin Truex Jr.: He’s got a deep voice, looks great in a firesuit, and is No. 1 for pete’s sake. For some reason, I see him in a picture shooting pool, with a face determined yet relaxed (kind of like the one he carries as he gets into his car on race day).
Carl Edwards: Sure, we have all seen the magazine cover that he was featured in that NASCAR fans shared with one another, and salivated over. It’s time for a new version. Just take your shirt off and pose any way you want to, Carl. It’s OK with us.
Bobby Labonte: A very attractive man with a playful sense of humor. I see him in a skeet shooting or hunting scene, taking a break with his gun beside him.
Marcos Ambrose: Yes, I’m a sucker for a man with an accent. Ambrose has that, as well as a wonderful sense of humor, good looks, and what appears to be none of the ‘macho man’ attitude that can make the most handsome man undesirable. A photo in the Australian outback, maybe? We would feel safe with you, Marcos.
Ron Hornaday: Our recent CTS champion proves that age can only have a positive influence on grim determination. No, he’s not a youngster, and that may be a large part of his charm. I see an image of him in the kitchen, making breakfast for two. I wonder if he really knows how to cook?
Bill Lester: He was born in California in 1961, when hippies loved love, and terms like ‘dig it’ and ‘far out’ were becoming common in communication. Whether or not he grew up to be groovy or square, he is really easy on the eyes. I see him walking on a beach, with palm trees in the background.
Mike Skinner: In interviews, I have seen him mischievous, stormy, relaxed, and excited. I have an idea that being with him is always a surprise. I see a picture of him in the cockpit of one his planes, ready to take you into flight.
And last but certainly not least, Bootie Barker. I have always found him very attractive, accompanied by a warm sense of humor. I had a chance to briefly meet him at Watkins Glen, and was so flustered I could barely speak. (Perhaps it was better that I couldn’t say anything.) I see a picture of him on the deck of a beautiful chalet in the mountains just as the sun is setting.
So there you have my twelve choices. I know that you have yours, too, fellow women of NASCAR. You are welcome to share them with all of us.
-
Shel Says:
Dec 21, 05:29 AMThanks for including Bobby. I have always thought he was incredibly sexy anyway….
-
3KillerBs Says:
Dec 21, 06:25 AMYou made a Nascar Hottie calendar without Kasey Kahne? Granted I’m too old for him, but the only serious competition he has for the title of “Handsomest Man on the Planet” is Matt Borland, who has even better silver hair than DJ. Doesn’t matter where you pose either of them. They’d look good anywhere.
I know a number of younger woman who would want to see Kyle Busch in that calendar. Not so much for his looks per say (though he’s improving rapidly as he fills out and leaves the “awkward puppy” stage of adolescence behind him), but for that mischievous, flirtatious smile that can have all the impact of a sledgehammer on blown glass. Pose him with his hair messed up and a little grease on his face and hands as he crawls out from under his late model.
And how about a picture of Ryan Newman? Pose him fishing and take the shot partially from behind so that his wonderful shoulders show to their fullest advantage. :)
-
Tracy Says:
Dec 21, 09:27 AMI am glad someone else noticed how good Martin Truex looks in a firesuit. He looks pretty good in a suit too if you have seen the Banquet pictures from this year. Wow!!
-
Kaye Says:
Dec 21, 09:55 AMWhat about Tony Stewart? That man is HOT!!
-
caw Says:
Dec 21, 10:19 AMIf you click on the link in the above article (where it says ‘my opinion’ in the first sentence), you can read the prior article and see the drivers that I picked then. Isn’t it wonderful to have so many sexy choices that it’s hard to only choose twelve of them? :)
-
Chandra L. Says:
Dec 22, 02:41 AMHow about a Canadian ? Pierre Bourque is my nominee. He’s got a polar bear and icebergs on his helmet – how Canadian is that !
I had him sign a card for me at ORP during the truck race. What a honey, gorgeous blue eyes, tall, handsome, a welcoming smile, and he speaks french too.
Click him lounging on a big comfy couch fireside while snow falls softly outside the window and I’ll buy a dozen of those calendars too.
Yum-o !
-
Sharon Says:
Dec 22, 03:32 PMHow about some dreamy eyes. David Stremme. No more needs to be said
-
riskybzns Says:
Dec 23, 12:17 PMyou sexiest pigs! why can’t there be a nascar’s hottest wives calendar? oh man, talking about doing some drooling :-)
-
caw Says:
Dec 23, 04:47 PMLOL! Funny you should mention that riskybzns! I’ve been trying to talk ‘JAW’ into doing a companion piece focusing on the sexy women of NASCAR. I’m going to show him your post to let him know it would be appreciated by the male NASCAR fans. ;)
-
tara Says:
Dec 24, 04:05 AMMay i suggest..
Denny Hamlin?
Cuz he is SEXY as all heck!
-
83forme Says:
Jun 8, 02:48 AM3KillerBs has it with the Kyle Busch idea! I adore Kyle and that would be awesome to see on a calendar ;)
Maybe add some Paul Menard and Brian Vickers as well.
Tony Stewart and Kyle Busch provide the fun at the awards show, and Jeff Gordon the ‘awww’ factor Bobby Labonte--On The Way Up
Dec 21, 03:12 AM
While it’s probably cliché, I’d like to nominate Elliott Sadler as a backup should any of these men have a prior commitment. If we’re just talking pictures, the man looks edible when he’s got longer, flyaway hair coupled with his goatee. And seriously, have you seen the way he fills out a fire suit?